Saturday, May 13, 2006

I should be beheaded!

Or at least be kicked in the butt.

Anonymous Linda, who probably isn't all that anonymous, made a comment about my absence which generated an email, which in turn reminded me about my blog. I haven't forgotten about it, but there is so much going on right now that I've been putting it off all the time and then, suddenly realized that I've been putting it off for almost a month!

Once again, thank you Linda. :)

Okay, where do I start? Let's see... school?

I'm doing quite well. In Swedish, my graded papers render me a steady assessment at PwH (Passed with Honour) on the verge of getting the assessment PwHH (Passed with High Honour). If I get the PwH at the end of semester, I'm quite satisfied but if I get the PwHH I'll probably sing for a week...

Math... I'm doing ok and will most probably pass the final exam but I'm not sure. I decided to take extra lessons, just in case. I barely passed all of the tests so far and my teacher has giving me some extra credit for "fighting spirit" but I really want that PwH. Strange that a subject I hated back in my teens has become so important (and fun) now.

Natural Science... There's only one thing about this class I don't like; the teacher. She's nice and all, but she treats us as if we were kids (or somewhat retarded). Okay, so some of the students barely passed their teens but the vast majority of us have families. This and the fact that she's very much a chemist doesn't make much for my comfort. My grades are just below PwH. I will get a BP on this one, I'm sure. That's a dissappointment since I love Natural Science, especially Biology.

I don't recall telling you that my life is very much made up by coincidence? Well, it is. I rarely plan anything, things just seem to happen to me. This time it's that class in Web design. I never planned to, but I'm slowly building a company based on that course. That class has also sparked an interest in programming. Probably it will mount out to nothing but what the hell...

Next semester I will study; Business economics (two levels in the same semester), Geography (on higher senior level) and Social Studies (higher senior level). I just might cram a class of programming into that or, depending on my results in math, a higher level of math.

Then, next spring, I'm taking on Swedish B, Religion, Jurisprudence, Pedagocical leadership and Marketing. That ought to be fun... I'm also considering Psycology.

The only thing I really, REALLY, regret in my life is that I didn't continue my studying when I finished compulsary school. I can't help wondering what my life would have looked like if I did. Then again, all those years at the fun fair and all those other jobs I've had, have given me experiences that other people don't have.

Okay, 'nuff about my education.

Me and LazyWorm have had quite some fights about his school. He hates going to school, not because he's being bullied which would be much easier to handle, but because he doesn't see the relationship between a good education and a good job. He finds school boring and has on numerous occasions stated that he wished that he'd never seen the inside of a classroom. That's when I usually remind him of the fact that he's one of the lucky ones who can read, write and add up numbers. Most of the worlds population don't have that luxury. Hell, they don't even sleep in a bed, eat every day or have the luxury of clean water!

Next year he'll turn fifteen and he really wants a scooter so we've made an agreement. He'll do his best at school and work all summer at the fun fair and I'll try to save some money. Then, in January we'll look at scooters we can afford. At first he claimed that we, as parents, were obligated to buy him a scooter (are swedish kids spoiled or what?!) but I quickly took that one out of him by telling him the harsh reality of life and economics. And, if I was to pay for a scooter, I was the one to decide what year, make, model, colour and condition it would be.

At one point he yelled that we didn't love him (because we didn't want to buy that scooter) but when I replied that in that case he didn't love us either since he didn't take care of his education, he became very quiet. Then I mentioned that his name means "The beloved one" and did he really think that we chose that name out of the blue? Teenagers!

RazorTongue is turning into a young female teenager with all that comes with it. One second she's really grown up and takes responsibility and the next she's just a little kid again. Sometimes I miss that scrawny little girl who preferred playing soccer over her dolls. Her boobies have, to her older brother's dismay and sometimes mean jokes, become noticeably bigger. And, in spite of me and her getting along well, she's becoming somewhat of a mystery to me. We could always talk about everything, even sex (in a very general way), but now she's starting to be secretive. Still, she asked me about shaving her legs, which I didn't forbid but explained that I'd prefer if she didn't do just yet. One of these days she'll probably ask me about shaving her pubic hairs too but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

(That's a fashion I really hate. Keeping it under control is one thing but clean shaved? Icky! This myth about it being more hygenic is just that, a myth. That hair is put there by Mother Nature for a reason and messing with Mother Nature rarely ends well. It prohibits excess warmth to the labia and thus reduces the risk of developing yeast infections. And, that hair traps pheromones, ie. it's a way to attract a suitable partner. I've rarely encountered a hairy vagina that smelled bad but I met a few hairless ones...)

CartoonBoy has finally learned how to swim short distances. (I've been trying to find a way to describe his autism but the best I can come up with is a blend of Rain Man and Forrest Gump. In some instances he's more like Dustin Hoffman's character (memorizing and social skills) but for the most part he's like Tom Hank's character.) Now he has to learn to keep his mouth shut while swimming. In school he's doing well considering his handicap and he often amazes us with his memorising skills.

LittleAngel has become a real tyrant. Well, at least she's pushing RedHead around. She throws things or pulls her hair if she get's frustrated or angry but ONLY when RedHead's around. If me and LA are alone, she's still that adorable little girl she's been all the time. She's full of all the mischief a two-year old possesses but she's never mean. To me, that is.

We've started potty-training. That is, LittleAngel started potty-training voluntarily, one of the benefits of day care and her seeing other kids on the potty. Coming to think about it, we've never actually potty-trained any of our kids. We've waited until they seemed to mature enough to understand the concept. That usually happened around their third birthday. We've never forced them onto the potty or forced them to go without diapers "to learn", hence we had fewer accidents and a reason to lose temper about them. The only thing we did was to let them feel that the diaper became somewhat uncomfortable after a little while, meaning we didn't change it at once but waited for a couple of minutes, regardless of the smell and/or their complaints. The potty soon became a really good alternative. Kids are smart and learn by themselves if you just let them. Even CartoonBoy learned very much faster than we expected. The key word is patience. Repeat after me: P a t i e n c e .

Patience is a virtue. Besides coincidence my life is based on that fact. I never rush after things I want, I let them come to me instead. Gives me much less heartburns and reduces the risk for a premature death. Speaking of death, I've almost succeded to quit smoking. I smoke two, sometimes three cigarettes a day. Once in the morning together with my first cup of coffee and one after dinner. The third one usually right before I go to sleep.

Now, to those gentlemen who read my blog and smoke; Please consider to quit that habit! Smoking, that is. Regardless of all other benefits by quitting, there one that you really should consider; Your erection. Beleive me, even if you don't think that you have a problem, you have. And don't you start to talk about Viagra, because that's only postphoning the problem.

I've never had a problem in getting it up (ok, on some occasions that has happened but I firmly beleive all men have that problem occasionally, mostly due to stress.) but in general it's never been a problem.

The last couple of months me and RedHead have had intercourse more often than the two last years combined. Regardless of the reasons why, we both noticed a difference after the decline in my smoking and RedHead summed it up nicely by saying: You're almost back in your early thirties." And that, gentlemen, is an understatement. It feels as if my dick has taken a trip back to my late teens.

And ladies, I don't know how your bottom-ends have been affected by smoking but you too might consider to quit.

Hey, I'm jumping all over different subjects today! Anyway, I'm leaving you with the immortal words of Thumper; If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all...


Virginia Gal said...

Welcome back! We were wondering where you had gone off too.

Congrad's on the school and passing with honors. I hope I can imitate your success as I start graduate school in the fall.

ps - I don't think Swedish kids are spoiled, come to America and see our kids, than you will realize what spoilt is.

JoeinVegas said...

Good grief - what an assortment of ideas in one post!

Just wait until daughter comes home on the back of a motorcycle with a greasy Hell's Angel. Then we'll see how daddy dad is.

Linda said...

What a relief, you are back. :) We missed ya! :)Glad you are doing well in school.