Thursday, October 06, 2005

A 100 things or so that you probably don't want to know about me.

Lists seem to be popular. Here's mine:

  1. I held the almost the same weight from the day I turned 15 to the day I turned 37 (or so).
  2. That weight was 64 kg. (9.9 stones or 138.89 lb's)
  3. I'm 182 cm tall. (5.97 ft)
  4. That means that my underweight was about 19 kg's. (2.99 stones or 41.88 lb's)
  5. That was in spite of eating only junk food for several years.
  6. I can still eat three whole pizzas if I'm in the mood for it.
  7. I can also eat 10 Big Mac's, without the fries and soda.
  8. My friends affectionally called me "garbage-can".
  9. I've never lost a bet on how much I could eat.
  10. My wieght has stabilized at 78 kg's. (12.28 stones or 171.96 lb's)
  11. I gained almost all that weight during my wifes last pregnancy.
  12. I started losing my hair at the age of 20.
  13. At the age of 27 I shaved it all of.
  14. I made a bet with a friend and won.
  15. Then I suddenly stopped losing hair at the age of 30.
  16. A couple of years later it started again.
  17. Now I shave it of at least three times a year.
  18. I was very blond as a child.
  19. My hair has darkened to a mixture between light grey and a rat's fur.
  20. I wouldn't dream of driving a car after drinking more than one Swedish "Folköl".
  21. That's 45 cl of beer (0.79 Imperial pt or 0.95 US pt).
  22. Swedish Folköl contains 3,5 % alcohol.
  23. I prefer lager like Norrlands Guld, Falcon Special Brew or the new Falcon Weiss.
  24. I'm drinking Rum & Cola right now.
  25. I only drink Cola together with Rum.
  26. Cola makes my cigarettes taste like mold.
  27. I smoke menthol cigarettes.
  28. Other cigarettes taste like burning hay.
  29. I almost succeeded quit smoking at the age of 29.
  30. Then I met my wife.
  31. She smoked a lot.
  32. I got to second base on our first date.
  33. I would have gone to third but she had promised to be home by midnight.
  34. That hurt.
  35. We made two home-runs the next evening.
  36. She was not a virgin.
  37. Neither was I.
  38. She was girl-friend No. 22.
  39. I had most of the previous relationships between the ages of 15 to 18.
  40. I met my first true love at the age of 18.
  41. That relationship lasted between January 3rd 1979 until July 25th 1985.
  42. That girl still means a lot to me.
  43. I was my wifes fourth boy-friend.
  44. She was twenty.
  45. I was twenty-nine.
  46. Her mother hated me for taking her "little girl away".
  47. She still hates me.
  48. I'm the guy who knocked her 45 kg's , anorectic, party-animalistic oldest daughter up.
  49. My mother-in-law still thinks that her daughters are teenagers.
  50. Both her daughters have children.
  51. Both her daughters prefered slim built men without pot-bellys.
  52. My mother-in-law likes 'em big and hairy.
  53. Her dream date is this guy.
  54. My father-in-law looks just like him.
  55. He's a nice guy.
  56. He's also full of racial prejudice and homophobian crap.
  57. That's one of the reasons we don't visit them a lot.
  58. Still, he defended a girl from Kosovo against her father.
  59. I hope that all my children will have mixed marriages.
  60. My wife's ancestory leads to Checkoslovakia.
  61. Her grandmother was imprisoned in the concentration camp of Theresienstadt.
  62. She was catholic.
  63. My wife inhereted her red hair.
  64. I'm a sucker for red hair.
  65. My first love was a redhead too.
  66. So were many of the previous girls.
  67. Out of 9 redheaded girls only three where real redheads.
  68. Those were my first love, a girl I met at the funfair and my wife.
  69. Actually, I met almost all my girlfriends at the funfair.
  70. My grandfather was a nazi officer.
  71. We recently found out that he refused to kill two Italian members of the Resistance.
  72. For that, he almost got executed.
  73. He died at the battle of Monte Cassino.
  74. My german grandmother never re-married.
  75. She lived together with a widowed carpenter for about thirty years.
  76. He died at the age of 92.
  77. The age difference between them was more than 25 years.
  78. She died at the age of 74.
  79. My Swedish grandmother is 82 and still alive and kickin'.
  80. She's got a twin sister.
  81. She had six children.
  82. They are all alive.
  83. Two of them are younger than me.
  84. Five of them have at least two children.
  85. The one who hasn't has none.
  86. I loved, and still love, going to school.
  87. I'm a real teacher's pet.
  88. Especially among female techers.
  89. Women often say I'm an interesting guy.
  90. They never say I'm good looking.
  91. That never bothered me.
  92. I'm not photogenic.
  93. But I love taking pictures.
  94. My biggest turn-on is a long fore-play.
  95. That is, I do the fore-play and she enjoys it most of the time.
  96. My biggest turn-off is a woman afraid of her own sexuality.
  97. I hate all that macho-stuff about "conquering women".
  98. Most of my relationships started by the woman taking the first step.
  99. My motto's for real manhood are: A Real Man doesn't "take" women, he get's them for free, A Real Man can change a diaper in spite of a severe hang-over and A Real Man manages his life without a mother.
  100. That last motto came from my late father.
  101. He meant that a man was no lesser of a man if he could do everything that a woman "normally" does, ie, washing, cleaning, sewing and so on.
  102. The only thing he never learned was to change a diaper.
  103. But at least he tried.
  104. My wife often gets pissed because I'm better at household chores than she is.
  105. I think she should be grateful that I don't demand her having dinner on the table.
  106. She can't cook anyhow.
  107. This list is getting too long.
  108. I think I'm going to post this and write a new list...

4 comments:

Catherine Vocalist said...

Excellent post! Very entertaining...

Piggy and Tazzy said...

I don't think I could think of 100 things about myself!

Menthol ciggies? Urrgh

Virginia Gal said...

Very interesting...glad to hear that there are some men out there who like the woman to take the first step!

Francesca said...

This was fun to read. NOw I want to do one of my own. Wonder how quick I can come up with 100+ things?! Will have to see!